Best quotes by Gilbert Gottfried on Me
Checkout quotes by Gilbert Gottfried on Me
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‟ I can't even find someone for a platonic relationship, much less the kind where someone wants to see me naked.
- Gilbert Gottfried
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‟ I used to go to the Improvisation Comedy Club every night in Times Square. How I didn't get killed in that area either means that 1) God is watching over me or 2) I am so insignificant to God that he didn't bother having me killed.
- Gilbert Gottfried
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‟ I was Jewish, through and through, although in our house that didn't mean a whole lot. We never went to synagogue. I never had a Bar Mitzvah. We didn't keep kosher or observe the Sabbath. In fact, I'm not so sure I would have known what the Sabbath looked like if it passed me on the street, so how could I observe it?
- Gilbert Gottfried
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‟ There are certain things I don't want to joke about. If it's about somebody else, it's fine. If it's about me, I think it's totally insensitive!
- Gilbert Gottfried
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‟ If the police ever try to pick me up, Michael Jackson told me I can hide out at his house.
- Gilbert Gottfried
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‟ I find Washington audiences are basically the same as every other audience; they watch me and go, 'Who's idea was it to go see him? And is it too late to ask for my money back?'
- Gilbert Gottfried
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‟ Any misfortune that happens to another person is funny. If it happens to someone else and not me, it's very funny.
- Gilbert Gottfried
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‟ I remember being at the premiere of 'Beverly Hills Cop II' and the tremendous reaction from the crowd outside, then going to a party at a hotel afterwards where the speakers were blasting 'Shakedown,' a song from the movie. That felt like a show biz moment to me.
- Gilbert Gottfried
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‟ With me, traveling for work is arriving at the airport, checking into the hotel, leaving the hotel the next morning at 4 or 5 to do something like 'The Jimmy and Jackie Captain Crazy Morning Zoo,' doing a bunch of those in a row, then going back to the hotel, and then finally going to the club.
- Gilbert Gottfried
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‟ I'm a very anti-vacation person. Because I'm always getting on planes for work, to me, a vacation is when I don't have to get on a plane.
- Gilbert Gottfried